The WORD – 12/18/08

I probably don’t have to tell anyone that this coming Sunday we will welcome in the festival of Hanukkah.  Somehow, whether it is “early” or “late” we all seem to figure out when Hanukkah will arrive. 

Although we all enjoy the latkes, the dreidels and the gifts, the major obligation on the Festival of Lights is what the ancient rabbis called “pirsuma d’nissa – publicizing the miracle.”  We do this in a number of ways, but the most prominent way is through the public display of lights.  The special nine-branched menorah – or hanukkiyah – is a testament to the victory of our outnumbered ancestors over the powerful Assyrian-Greek army.  

This year, we have two special opportunities to participate in publicizing the miracle:

(1) Summit Community Menorah Lighting. Sunday, December 21^st, 4:00 PM, at Temple Sinai. The three Jewish congregations in Summit have joined together to purchase an oversized menorah, which will rotate among the congregations from year to year. This year, it will be on display on the grounds of Temple Sinai. We will join together for the first lighting of this menorah this Sunday. 

(2) New Providence Community Menorah Lighting, Monday, December 22^nd, 7:00 PM, at Faith Lutheran Church. For the second year, Faith Lutheran Church will have a menorah on its lawn during the eight days of Hanukkah. Since there is no synagogue in the borough itself, Faith Lutheran has graciously agreed to display the menorah so that we need not put one on public grounds.

Lastly, if you find yourself stuck in an elevator, store or office with Christmas Muzak  playing, perhaps these lyrics will help you publicize the miracle…

Pancakes frying in a vat of oil,

New socks gripping at my toes.

Colored wax drips on aluminum foil

From the candles lined up in rows

 

Everybody knows a latke and some applesauce

Help to make this holiday.

Spinning tops on the table all across

Perhaps will end up on a ‘hey.’

 

Kids love this Festival of Lights,

They look forward to each of the eight nights.

And every Jewish child is gonna know

That our presents have blue and silver bows.

 

And so I’m offering this simple phrase

For kids from one to ninety two

Though it has been spelled many times, many ways –

Happy Hanukkah to you.

RAF.

The WORD – 12/11/08

Arguably, the most disturbing news story in recent weeks has been the case of a 17-year-old boy escaping from the California home in which he had been held captive and abused for the last year.  The dirty, emaciated, young man appeared in the lobby of a fitness center and asked to be hidden before his tormentors found him.  The saddest part of this story is that after being removed from an abusive home, he was place in the care of his aunt who, in turn, orchestrated his imprisonment and torture in the home of a Girl Scout troop leader.  We can only hope that he will now find a safe place in which to recover from these horrible experiences.

In this week’s Torah portion, we read of young person who was the object of abuse.  Dinah – the one daughter of Jacob – went out to visit with the “daughters of the land” (see Gen. 34:1).  It is no surprise that a young woman who lived with twelve brothers might have wanted some female company.  However, instead of enjoying a little time with other young women, she was raped by Shechem – the son of the local chieftain. 

Given what we know of “honor” in the modern Middle East, we might have expected that the males of Dinah’s family would punish HER for venturing too far from home.  Yet, they do nothing of the sort.  Instead, they avenge her rape by punishing the perpetrator and the other male members of his town.  One could certainly argue that Dinah’s brothers went too far in their pursuit of justice.  However, one thing is clear – they recognized that it is the role of family to protect their own.  It is the role of family to provide a safe, nurturing environment for children. 

Sadly, we know that this is not always the case – as we saw in the California case mentioned above.  Further, we know that sexual assault and domestic violence are difficult topics to discuss openly.  Shame and denial are incredibly powerful forces.  We’d like to think that these sorts of things don’t happen in our Jewish community, and if they do, we just wish that they would go away.

But, they don’t just go away.  It is up to us to address abuse when we see it.  It is up to protect the most vulnerable members of our community.

That is why the Jewish community in MetroWest has created the Rachel Coalition.  We have an obligation not only to keep our own family safe, but to make sure that victims of abuse in our community have someplace to go and someone to help them.  

RAF.

Resolution in Support of Hekhsher Tzedek

Earlier this evening, at our Board of Trustees meeting, the SJCC Board passed the resolution below which will link us to other congregations across the country in supporting the Hekhsher Tzedek program which I discussed on Yom Kippur.  Hopefully, if enough congregations join us, our movement will be able to have a real impact on the conduct of kosher food producers.

RAF.

 

Update 12/11/09: See today’s New York Times for an interesting article on this topic.

 

SJCC Resolution Supporting Hekhsher Tzedek

Whereas, the Summit Jewish Community Center is committed to encouraging members to perform Mitzvot encompassing ethical and ritual observance; and

Whereas, Kashrut is a core value of our institution and of the Conservative Movement; and

Whereas, we understand that Kashrut teaches reverence for life and humane treatment of animals (See James M. Lebeau, Jewish Dietary Laws: Sanctify Life, New York, NY: United Synagogue of America, Department of Youth Activities, 1983, inter alia); and

Whereas, our institution continues to express its commitment to social justice; and

Whereas, Torah teaches us concerning the rights of workers, as in “The wages of a laborer shall not remain with you until morning (Lev. 19:13) and “You shall not abuse a needy and destitute laborer, whether a fellow countryman or a stranger…You must pay him his wages on the same day…for he is needy and sets his life on it; else he will cry to God against you and you will incur guilt.” (Deut. 24:14-15) and “Whoever keeps the salary from a worker is as if taking his/her life, and transgresses five negative commandments and one positive command.” (Shulhan Arukh, Hoshen Mishpat 339:2); and

Whereas, Torah teaches us the importance of business ethics as in “You shall not falsify measures of length, weight or capacity. You shall have an honest balance, honest weights, an honest ephah, and an honest hin.” (Lev. 19:35); and

Whereas, our congregation continues to express its commitment to environmental protection; and

Whereas, reports of worker abuse, animal cruelty and corrupt business practices in a segment of the kosher meat industry have caused a tremendous desecration of God’s name.

Therefore, be it resolved that we stand fully behind the development of a Hekhsher Tzedek to be applied to the kosher food industry; and

Be it further resolved that the congregation supports the work of the Joint Hekhsher Tzedek Commission comprised of representatives of United Synagogue of Conservative Judaism and the Rabbinical Assembly; and

Be it further resolved that the congregation supports the development of the Hekhsher Tzedek that will evaluate Kosher food manufacturers in the areas of

•             Employee welfare, including fair wages, benefits, health safety;
•             Employee training;
•             Quality control and animal welfare;
•             Corporate accountability and integrity; and
•             Environmental impact.

The WORD – 12/4/08

Today, we all book airline tickets on-line ticket because it’s supposed to save us money and time.  It struck me recently that even when one is booking a round-trip ticket, the computer treats it like two separate trips.  So, for each leg of the journey, it is necessary to put in the cities of origin and destination: Newark-to-Chicago and Chicago-to-Newar,.  It is not sufficient to say round trip to Chicago and back. 

The computer always wants to know from where we are coming and to where we are going. 

This week’s Torah portion begins with a short, simple verse: “Yaakov left Beer-Sheva, and set out for Haran.”  The Midrash immediately picks up on the language of departure AND arrival.  The rabbis say that the departure of a righteous man has an impact on a place as does his arrival in a new place. In other words, we know that our presence has an effect on a situation.  What we sometimes forget is that our absence can be consequential as well.

We see this in the political world.  With each cabinet appointment that President-Elect Obama makes, we discuss the person’s ability to fill the post.  But, we don’t stop there.  We also begin discussing who will take that person’s current position.  So, it’s not enough to talk about what kind of Secretary of State Hillary Clinton will make.  We must also try to guess who will be the next junior senator from the state of New York.

However, I don’t believe that this Midrash is speaking only about the righteous or the politically important.  It is speaking to each and every one of us - as individuals and as a community.  The decisions we make DO have an impact on those around us. 

When we as individuals choose to incorporate mitzvot into our lives, we certainly increase the quality of our own lives, but we also have an impact on those around us.  When we visit the sick or elderly, for example, we give AND receive.  When we bring Shabbat into our homes, everyone in our home can feel it. When we DON’T do these things, the absence is profound.  The quality of our own life is diminished and others feel the deficiency as well. 

As we go forward from this week of Parashat Vayetze, as we make these sorts of choices, may we be mindful of how our presence and our absence can each make a difference in the lives of the people around us.

RAF.

Killings in Mumbai

I have been thinking a lot about the murder of the young Chabad rabbi and his wife in Mumbai.  During my last year of rabbinical school, I had an internship with the Executive Vice President of the Rabbinical Assembly.  One day, he asked me if I had ever considered going abroad for my first position as a rabbi.  At the time, there was new Conservative congregation in Sweden looking for a rabbi.  I thought about it for all of two seconds before saying it was not for me.  Jodi was pregnant at the time, and I could not imagine us being in a strange country when our first child was born.  Yet, Rabbi Gavriel & Rivka Holtzberg went to Mumbai, India at the ages of 24 & 23 to teach Torah to the Jews who live there and the Jews who pass through. 

Anyone who knows me knows that I am not a big fan of Chabad, but these two individuals were dedicated, selfless teachers of Torah.  Their senseless murders are a tragedy.

Organ Donation

A couple of weeks ago, we were fortunate to have a “guest” speaker discuss organ donation with us on Shabbat morning.  The “guest” was Yael Coppleson who grew up in our congregation (daughter of Linda & Victor), but has gone on to become an expert in this area.

Here are a few of the relevant sources on organ donation:

 Leviticus 19:16: “You shall not stand idly by the blood of your neighbor.”

 Rabbi Shlomo Yitzhaki (Rashi), Commentary on Babylonian Talmud Sanhedrin 73a: “‘You shall not stand idly by the blood of your neighbor’ means ‘You shall not rely on yourself alone.’   Rather, your must turn to all available resources so that your neighbor’s blood will not be lost.”

 Moses Maimonides, Laws of Murder & Guarding Life 1:14: “Anyone who is able to save a life, but fails to do so, violates ‘You shall not stand idly by the blood of your neighbor.’”

 Babylonian Talmud Yoma 82a: “Preservation of life overrides all other considerations.”

 Rabbi Theodore Friedman, CJLS Responsum, 1953: “Greater is saving a life than the dignity of the dead – k’vod ha-met.”

 Rabbi Isaac Klein, A Guide to Jewish Religious Practice, 1979:  ”There is no greater k’vod ha-met than to bring healing to the living.”

 Rabbi Moshe Tendler, on behalf of the Chief Rabbinate of Israel, 1994:  ”All rabbinic authorities agree that the classic definition of death in Judaism is the absence of spontaneous respiration in a patient with no other signs of life….  Brain death is a criterion for confirming death in a patient who already has irreversible absence of spontaneous respiration.”

 Rabbi David Golinkin, Responsa of the Va’ad ha-Halachah of the Israeli RA, 1994:  “It is not merely permissible for a Jew to bequeath his organs for transplantation following his death, it is a mitzvah for him to do so, in order to save one life or several lives.”

 The Conservative Movement’s Rabbinical Assembly Resolution of 1990:  “The Rabbinical Assembly affirms the life-giving benefits of organ and tissue donation, and thereby encourages all Conservative Jews to become enrolled as organ and tissue donors.”  (See also: United Synagogue of Conservative Judaism )

Union for Reform Judaism statement of 1997: “The Union of American Hebrew Congregations (since renamed: Union for Reform Judaism) is committed to the concept of Organ Donation and Transplantation as a positive example of the traditional Jewish value of saving a life.”

The Orthodox Rabbinical Council of America statement of 1991:  “Since organs that can be life-saving may be donated, the family is urged to do so.  When human life can be saved, it must be saved.  The halachah (Jewish Law) therefore looks with great favor on those who facilitate the procurement of life-saving organ donations.”

Another important organizaiton that anyone concerned about this issue should be aware of is the Halachic Organ Donor Society .

RAF

The WORD – 11/26/08 Thanksgiving

From the moment that a child is welcomed into our community, we pray for three things to happen to happen to that child.  (1) We want her to learn about our tradition – Torah.  (2) We want him to find companionship – Huppah. (3) We want her to do good things with her life – Ma’asim Tovim.  No matter how young our children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews or neighbors might be, we start dreaming of their future.  We plan where they will go to college.  We imagine whom they will marry.  We envision all the wonderful things they will do.  In short, we wonder how they are going to turn out.

 

This week’s Torah portion, Toldot (which literally means ‘generations’), deals with the adult children of our Patriarchs trying to find their way in the world.  In the opening verses, Yitzhak married Rivkah and they started their family.  Ultimately, their two sons – Ya’akov and Esav – grew up and found their companions in order to start their families.  We begin to see how the special relationship between God and Avraham was passed down through generations.  It was not as painless and simple as one might have expected.

 

As we read the story of our ancestors, one of the things that becomes clear is that as we get older, our family relationships can become even more complicated.  While it is true that Ya’akov and Esav struggled with one another even in the womb (see Gen. 25:22), things got worse as they got older.  They vied for their parents’ affection.  They argued over the family birthright.  And they tried to please their parents through their choices of spouses (with varying results). 

 

Some things never change.

 

This weekend, most of us will join together with our families (or our in-laws), and many of these same issues will come to the fore – unresolved childhood rivalries, disputes over family heirlooms, strained relations with in-laws – just to name a few.  Let’s hold up the example of matriarchs and patriarchs as a classic example of what NOT to do.  There is nothing noble in brothers not speaking to one another for twenty years.  There is nothing admirable in parents playing favorites.  There is nothing commendable in choosing a spouse to send a message to one’s parents. 

 

Instead, let’s use this Thanksgiving weekend as an opportunity to mend damaged relationships and strengthen healthy ones.   Then, we will truly have something for which to be thankful.

 

 

 

 

RAF.

 

 

The WORD – 11/20/08

When I work with a couple to prepare for their wedding day, I always suggest the tradition of the bride walking around the groom seven times.  More often than not, the bride rejects it immediately.  Brides generally give one of two reasons for this rejection: either she is afraid that she will fall or she sees it as being subservient to the groom. 

 

While I cannot do anything about her concerns regarding the dizziness, I can help her to understand that this beautiful tradition is anything but subservient.  Let me explain. 

             

In the Torah, walking around something is a method of acquiring it.  For example, in Genesis 12:5-9, Avraham walked all around Eretz Yisrael, as God gave the land to him.  Also, in the sixth chapter of the Book of Joshuah, the Israelites walked around the city of Jericho seven times, as they began their conquest of Eretz Yisrael.   

 

With this concept in mind, a wedding cannot be perceived as a transaction through which a groom acquires his bride.  It must be considered a reciprocal acquisition, which brings us to this week’s Torah portion. 

 

Parashat Hayei Sarah begins with Sarah’s death, and Avraham’s immediate reaction.  He quickly went to find the owner of the Mahpelah Cave in order to bury Sarah in it.  The verb used to describe Avraham’s action is “vayakom,” translated as “he rose.”  After careful negotiations, Avraham acquired the cave as well as the field surrounding it.   

 

The narrative then continues, “vayakom s’deh Efron,” which could be translated as “the field of Efron rose to Avraham.”  (Our Etz Hayim Humash translates it as “the field of Efron passed.”) 

 

In a strange way, it seems as though the land was acquiring Avraham as much as he was acquiring it.  All modern politics aside, this was the beginning of the special relationship between our people and the land.  This story is immediately followed by the loving union of Yitzhak and Rivkah (see Genesis 24:67). 

 

The Jewish people’s love affair with the Land of Israel is not based on what we do for the land, such as transforming the desert into rich farmland.  Nor is it based on how the land affects us every time we visit.  It is an inter-relationship.   

 

Through juxtaposition, we learn that it should be the same between people as well.  A union in which one partner owns the other is doomed to failure.  However, when each has invested in the other – when they raise one another up – then perhaps they will find love equal to that of Yitzhak and Rivkah. 

The WORD – 11/13/08

Just yesterday, I bumped into a colleague whom I had not seen in a few years.  He told me the story of how he and his wife were in the process of adopting two children from Nepal when all international adoptions in that country were frozen.  He and wife are now in a “holding pattern.”  We all know couples – friends, relatives, co-workers – who are in pain as they try to create a family.  This is by no means a new phenomenon.  In this week’s Torah Portion, Vayera, we read of Avraham and Sarah’s attempt to deal with infertility.

 

God promised Avraham and Sarah that they would be the progenitors of a great nation.  Yet, they both reached advanced ages childless.  Thus, Avraham and Sarah took three difficult, courageous steps as they tried to overcome their inability to conceive a child.

 

Their first step toward creating a family was adoption.  In last week’s Torah portion, we read how Avraham and Sarah brought their nephew Lot with them on the journey which God had asked them to make (Genesis 12:4-5).  The moment that Avraham agreed to take in his deceased brother’s son, he became Lot’s father, a point which is reinforced by our Talmudic tradition.  “Whoever brings up an orphan in his home is regarded, according to Scripture, as though the child had been born to him (Sanhedrin 19b).”

 

When Lot grew older and moved away from Avraham and Sarah, they once again found themselves yearning for a child.  This time, they turned to a surrogate mother – Hagar.  She gave birth to Ishmael, who would grow up under Avraham and Sarah’s roof. 

 

Today, the legal authorities of the Conservative Movement are split as to the permissibility of surrogate motherhood.  Both the proponents and the opponents use the passage from Genesis 16 to prove their point. 

 

On the one hand, Avraham and Sarah clearly employed Hagar as a surrogate.  On the other hand, we see the complications which can arise as a result of the arrangement.  Nonetheless, Avraham and Sarah used all the means at their disposal to combat their infertility.

 

Their third, and final, attempt to bring a child into their home can be found in this week’s portion.   They sought intervention.  Although Sarah cynically laughed when she found out that she would conceive so late in life, she did not refuse the assistance of God and God’s angels.  Avraham and she gladly welcomed Yitzhak into their home.

 

Obviously, we no longer expect God’s messengers to arrive at our door with the news of a future pregnancy.  However, we do view doctors as being God’s instruments of healing in our world.  Thus, when a fertility expert enables a previously infertile couple to conceive, we view it as an act of God.  We view that doctor as an agent of God.

 

It is easy to fall into the trap of thinking that our ancient texts do not speak to modern issues.  It would be a mistake to do so, though.  Hopefully, any couple that is wrestling with the issue of infertility will both take comfort as well as learn from Avraham and Sarah that one perfect answer does not necessarily exist.  Sometimes, it takes a multi-faceted approach.  Like Avraham and Sarah, may their prayers be answered.

 

 

RAF.

The WORD – 11/6/08

Well… it’s over.  About 64 million of us are pleased with the result and nearly 57 million of us are disappointed and perhaps anxious.  

 

Elections are inherently divisive.  In order to succeed, all candidates must show the differences between themselves and their opponents.  Otherwise, there would be no advantage to voting for one versus the other.  It seems to me, though, that each Presidential election seems to bring out new lows in character assassination and ad hominem attacks.

 

Now that the election is over, however, if the candidate that we were supporting lost, then we must find a way to look at the other candidate as our President. Both sides must find a way to set aside our differences with neighbors, friends or colleagues who supported the other candidate.  We must find a way to live together with people whose views are different than our own.  We must minimize the desire to divide our country into Red America and Blue America.

Although it might be difficult, we would certainly not be the first to reconcile after a stark disagreement.  This week in Parashat Lech L’cha, we read of the great difficulty between Yitzhak and Yishmael – the two sons of Avraham.  Their rivalry caused great pain in their family.  They could not even live together.  However, in two weeks’ time, we will read Parashat Hayei Sarah in which Avraham’s death is described.  We learn in that Torah portion that “his sons Yitzhak and Yishmael buried him (Gen 25:9).”  Sadly, it took their father’s passing to bring them back together, but ultimately they did in fact come together. 

 

Furthermore, both of these sons had a grievance with their father.  Avraham bound Yitzhak to an altar and almost sacrificed him to God.  He also kicked Yishmael out of their home.  They ultimately were able to overcome any hard feelings that they harbored for their father.  Although the Torah tells us nothing of Yitzhak and Yishmael’s relationship from that day forward, on that critical day, they created Shalom Bayit – domestic tranquility – where it had been sorely lacking. 

 

The truth is that reconciliation is not restricted to politics and the Bible.  We all have people in our lives – or who used to be a part of our lives – with whom we must reconcile.  There are friends with whom we have lost touch, or family members with whom we hold a grudge.  It is not easy to reach out.  We have all built up walls of defense to keep the pain out.  In order to reach out, we must break through those walls.

 

As we think about how our country may change as a result of Tuesday’s election, may we have all have the strength to look at ourselves honestly, to look to God for support, to subjugate our egos and to act kindly toward others as we strive to repair the damaged relationships in our lives.

 

RAF.